In Which I Quote Niles Crane

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Gentle Reader,

So the other day I went into town to have wine lunch with a friend.  It had been too long, and it was so lovely to catch up.  She’s in the marketing business and we were talking about writing and advertising and whatnot.  (I’m fascinated with this because my chosen profession is interesting to practically nobody, and also-“Mad Men”.)  And then we talked about the blog and what I’m doing now.  And, to be blunt:  I’m very much of the opinion that the “American Idol” phenomenon (and its progeny and ilk) has created some serious delusions of adequacy here in our fair land, and so let me state upfront:  I am by no means a writer.  (I don’t know what I am, but that’s really not an interesting post to read, so we’ll talk about what I’m about to talk about instead.)  I enjoy writing here on the blog, and I think I’m hilarious, and I am tickled that anybody wants to read this (PLEASE tell me that there is at least one soul, WHO DOESN’T SHARE MY DNA, that reads this…whatever this is…), but a writer that does not make.

That being said, I really do like this, I enjoy it, and lately, it’s been useful in thinking through some of the craziness of the last, holy cow, it’s only been three months.  Lord.  Anyway, my friend asked me if I had monetized the blog.  And I believe we all know the answer to that.

So we talked a little bit about that, and then the other night, I watched the “Frontline” special called, “Generation Like”.  It’s all about the monetization of the FB, the Twitter, the YouTubes, et al.  And people, I got entirely skeeved out.  The sheer amount of personal consumer data available to the determined company boggles the mind.  I don’t really want to enter that foray.  And it kind of makes me twitchy and like I need to go take a long shower using several bars of soap.

I am still trying to sort out my thoughts on all of that and really have nothing else to say right now on the subject, but it is relevant to our discussion here because in the process of talking about the blog and the FB and all of the new and fancy things you can do with social media we talked about The Ask Button.  (I am assuming you have at least heard of it, because if I have?  The only person alive who hasn’t yet is Mama and she’ll read this and be up to speed.)

Apparently this button allows you to ask your FB friend about his or her relationship status.  I have a sneaking suspicion that this is a solution desperately in need of a problem.  But, as Niles Crane once said, “How thrilling to be present at the birth of a new phobia.”

Because once we started talking about it, I began to wonder if somehow I had clicked on this button by accident?  Have I somehow accidentally propositioned all of my FB friends?  I’m friends with a couple of under-18s, am I facing lifetime registration because I don’t know how to operate FB?  (Look, I have Labradors because Collies and Poodles and higher-order dogs are too smart for me, I get lost going to my own house at night, and I cannot cook rice–EVEN WITH A RICE COOKER.  Never overestimate my talent.)  Do all of my FB friends think that I have some kind of lurking crush on them?

Aside:  How come we don’t throw Crush Parties as grownups?  Those were SO MUCH FUN in college.  And everybody, even the long-term attached, has crushes.  Not only romantic ones.  We need to bring back the Crush Party and show the Jaeger-bombing undergrads how a real party does.  Civilized, beginning at 8, ending at midnight or when the lampshade hits somebody’s head, home in time for Letterman on DVR.  No mascara residue-filled Walk of Shame in the morning!

Anyway-all that to say that if you have gotten some kind of random ask from me, I’m not trying to FB stalk you, and if I’ve bombarded you with Candy Crush stuff…see above and click delete as appropriate.

Have a fantastic Memorial Day weekend, I’ll be back Tuesday with an update on the creatures.



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